A sassy, crafty mama bird from Los Angeles
raising a very sweet little girl with Autism
and a new baby boy in the Midwest... and other stuff, too.

Friday, September 26, 2014

This is 37

Tomorrow is my birthday. At 37 years old, I'm now a midwestern mom of two, living in a suburban home surrounded by neighbors who wave to each other and would have no trouble stopping by to borrow a cup of sugar. I have a small garden which produced enough this summer for me to make and freeze food for my baby boy- the same boy for whom I just finished knitting a sweater; a new pair of leg warmers for the girl is the next project.

I sit here on my deck in the sunshine with a cup of decaf (ugh, still nursing a baby who hates caffeine), nestled up against protected wetlands with leaves beginning to change their colors. I look at my tomato and bean plants, not even getting pissed at the chipmunk who ate my basil and cilantro, listening to the whirr of the baby's diaper's in the dryer, smelling the blueberries and bananas I'm roasting him. I just waved goodbye to the short yellow bus which took by beautiful Little Bird to school. I couldn't possibly feel further away from the spoiled, self-absorbed LA/valley girl, like, totally running the rat race. I have a really simple life these days, and I'm always trying to find ways to make it even a little bit more simple.

I have an incredible, supportive, talented, smart, fun and funny life partner that gives me butterflies every time my eyes catch his. I have two fabulous kids who never stop challenging me to be a better person and to stay in the present moment, providing me with laugh-out-loud moments daily and times when I want the clocks to stop ticking. I have healthy parents, who live a life that makes them happy, allowing them to spend time with their grandchildren often despite living two thousand miles away. And I have some friends. Not a lot. Just enough to share in my joys and accomplishments and to support and carry me through the tough times. I've found a great community of parents raising children with disabilities who get it- triumphs and the trials; they are all in it with me. I get to spend my time working on my awesome and rewarding business, finding ways to make life easier for families like mine.

This is thirty seven. I'll celebrate my birthday tomorrow with some yoga, some apple picking out at an orchard that happens to also make incredible cider and fresh donuts, some take-out thai, and maybe an apple crisp with the "fruits of our labor."

Thirty six was pretty amazing. My double chai birthday indeed brought me new life with J Bird. I have some pretty great (really great!!) things planned for 37, too, and I'm very excited about that. My biggest goals for this new year of life are to breathe and continue breathing, to stop taking things so personally (the second of the four agreements), to put on my own oxygen mask first, and to make an effort to get a babysitter at least once a month.

I don't dread getting older. I keep thinking about one of my favorite quotes. It was spoken by Joan of Arc: "I am not afraid. I was born to do this."

One foot in front of the other, leaping into thirty seven.

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