A sassy, crafty mama bird from Los Angeles
raising a very sweet little girl with Autism
and a new baby boy in the Midwest... and other stuff, too.

Thursday, January 13, 2011

A teaspoon of perspective




"I'm just trying to get the engine to turn
I'm just tryin' to smile through my tears
And I still got so much to learn
But the best I can is what I have to give
Gonna give it while I'm here"
-Tift Merritt



First I saw my friend Melissa post something on twitter about being the "anti-Chinese mother" and I wondered what that was about. Then I read my friend Carrie's post on her blog, The Doctor Mom (see, she's a doctor and a mom, so The Doctor Mom. Get it?). Okay so now I know what they were talking about. A Chinese woman wrote a book called The Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother. Apparently there was a piece in this weekend's WSJ about it. I didn't know because despite the fact that the WSJ is actually delivered to my home each morning, I refuse to read that massively right wing propaganda. I prefer the lefty prop! But I digress. Anyway, the excerpt spoke of the Chinese mothers' insistence on excellence: straight As, top of the class, no time for playing, etc. So I read Carrie's post (you should, too) and I commented. Then I moved on to something else (probably a Big Daddy cartoon or something very important like that). But, I wasn't done. Nope, I kept thinking about it and I decided to share this thought with all of you. Yeah, thank me later.


The deal is that I had a moment of gratitude because here's a big fat dose of perspective. So I want to share with you the comment I left of Carrie's post:


That's it. You can go about your business now. Go on. Go. 


Oh, but first you can click on this little picture here and vote for me. 

14 comments:

Piscesgirl said...

I love the comment that you left. And you are right. No one should stress about how their child will suceed as an adult that the parents rob them of a childhood. In my opinion... Darla :)

JennieB said...

My tweet about this had to do with how the Chinese mom would handle a child with autism. I want my kids to achieve but on their own terms, and with joy and happiness as part of their lives, not stress and fear of failure.

Brenda said...

You're exactly right. That's what I love about the many gifts of a special needs child.

Ashley said...

Amen, amen and amen.

Adoption of Jane said...

They talked about that book on that cbs show "The Talk" the other day. I feel the same as you.

Doccarrie said...

I am in the middle of the book and it is interesting to know that she grew up with a special needs sibling(with downs). I don't know that someone like this would do well with this parenting style with a special needs child. It may teach her and thing or two about what's important. But I bet she'd find a different way of implementing it.

Christine said...

I volunteer with a couple of autistic girls and I have to laugh thinking about them being raised by a "Chinese Mother". Those little girls are so wicked smart, I can just imagine them trying to figure out how to get out of doing something that they won't want to do.....

Dani G said...

Ha! Christine, you are so right!!

Big Daddy Autism said...

I'm glad my toons weren't too much of a distraction.

Jessica said...

So well said. Perfect, like our girls.

Lynn said...

Yeah, I'd like see what a Chinese mother would do with my kid. She's have to learn to adapt or go nuts.

Cheryl D. said...

Kids need to play. They're kids. They're only kids for a short time.

What's wrong with people?

melissa said...

she had a deal w/her hubby. the kids would be raised jewish as long as she could parent them the chinese way.
ugh.

Laura @ The Things I Said I'd Never Do said...

I read about that book in my version of the the newspaper, Entertainment Weekly. It made me sick to my stomach to hear about a parent who would willfully chose such a strict options when she knows more loving ways to parent. I love your comment. You bring to light the positives of having a special needs child when all society wants to focus on are the negatives.

I look forward to reading the daughters memoir 30 years from now when she talks about how rebelling from her horrible mother turned her into a meth head.

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