A sassy, crafty mama bird from Los Angeles
raising a very sweet little girl with Autism
and a new baby boy in the Midwest... and other stuff, too.

Monday, December 6, 2010

A special appearance by Lynn

My first guest!! How appropriate that it's Lynn, The Autism Army Mom and one of my favorite bloggers. Remember when I went to Chicago and got to spend a little time IN PERSON with her? Fun!! She's so awesome, and not just because she answers my texts, emails, facebook messages, twitter DMs when I'm freaking out in the middle of the night :) Lynn is smart, fun and funny. She takes life with Audrey, her 6 year old with Autism, and and is able to find the humor in every difficult situation. Oh, and you should totally friend her on facebook because she's so jealous of been trying to catch up to my 765 friends.
So, ladies and gentlemen, I bring you.... Lynn!!

I've only done a handful of guest blogging gigs before this, and each time I've tried to write something original that had some tie-in to the host's blog.  For "Big Daddy" I wrote about blog pseudonyms, for Amanda at Life is a Spectrum I wrote about our kids getting married, and for Jillsmo at Yeah. Good Times. I wrote about the time that I lived in her home state of California.  Given that, what should I write about for Dani G?  (Fingers drumming on table...)
I've met her in person so I could write about what a hot piece of ass she is.  She's always up for that.  Nah.  I know!  I could write about poop because this blog is famous for lots of poop talk.  Since we are always talking about our kids' poop, maybe we could talk about ours for a change.  Maybe it would be fun to poll our readers about which store they most commonly are patronizing when they get a turtlehead and have to beat feet to the dreaded public restroom.  Cuz seriously mine would be Kohl's hands-down.  OK, maybe that's not such a good idea.
Poop.  Poop.  Poop.  We have been fortunate that Audrey has not had many of the poop issues that are so common amongst autistic kids.  When she was between 2 and 4, she would sometimes go through bouts of diarrhea that would last anywhere between 4 and 8 weeks. 
But I was never sure if it was autism-related GI stuff, a side effect of the supplements that we gave her (because cod liver oil and magnesium tend to do that), or the typical "toddler diarrhea" that I read about in "What to Expect..."  She was still in diapers for those, and has blasted out of them and onto unsuspecting relatives' carpets and carseats from coast to coast.  You should seriously consider never sitting in another airplane seat again. 
I waited until Audrey was over 4 to even attempt potty training.  She got the #1 part down pretty fast, but she wanted nothing to do with putting #2 in the toilet.  It was all good if it was shooting up her back and readily available for fondling and smearing on carpet, but the toilet?  Well that would just be a waste. 
I finally got her trained for #2 by getting her to imitate me pretending that I was grunting and straining to pinch one out, in combination with a reinforcer of a Dark Chocolate Chocolate Chunk gluten-free cookie.  Which was appropriate because the cookie looked for all the world like a turd.
Don't hate me because I got one break in life...potty training was the thing that I most dreaded and assumed would hold years of failure before it was mastered that actually came very easily to Audrey. 
Now THAT'S one hot piece of ass....

18 comments:

JustMom420zaks said...

Funny. Poop is always a good standby. I'm always thinking of jumping on this gluten-free bus, but so many things have gluten... I'd have to change my son's entire diet, and then because I can't give him anything without my daughter wanting some... this could get expensive.
Anyways. Newest follower... just so you know, I ramble, and make comments with a lot of ellipses.
;)

4timesblessed said...

Great write. I too like Lynn's blog. It is funny and lights up my dark moments. I am inspired by all my fellow bloggers who seem to be able to make good out of bad.

Jen said...

I will be your fb friend! I have no where near 700 something. And, can I brag? I had Katie done at 2 1/2. She could have sat in a dirty diaper for DAYS, but the second I put panties on her, she couldn't take feeling the mess. And thank goodness, bc training sucked as she didn't get the concept of chocolate AFTER she went and many a meltdown was had on the potty. Once I stopped "training" and went cold turkey, she somehow caught on.

Ashley said...

Caleb was past his 4th birthday by the time we got the poop training done. I cannot for the life of me figure out why he would purposely wait and poop in his pants/pull-up/anywhere besides the toilet. Maybe a sensory thing? Eww. The best was when he pooped his pants at the very tippy-top of the Chick-fil-a playground and refused to come down. That was fun. We had a large audience of other kids and moms with their scrunched up faces that I just kinda wanted to punch at the time. I've grown up since then and now I just don't care. Yay me! =)

@jencull (jen) said...

toilet training? *sticks fingers in ears* lalalalala

Dani G said...

Look, my bird pees on the potty like a champ! She will come find me wherever I am and announce "its potty time!"

What? poop? Check in with me in about a year...

Cheryl D. said...

I love Lynn! She's so brilliant--even writing about poop! LOL

Big Daddy Autism said...

Poop stories? Yay. I've got a few too. My boy didn't start doing #2 in the potty until he was almost 8. Do you have any idea what a McDonalds Value Meal #1 looks like when it becomes #2 in an 8 year old's diaper? Me either. But my wife says it bad. Really, really, really bad.

cooperl788 said...

Oh Lynn, I always love how refreshing it is to read a post by you. Georgia has those long bouts of diarrhea too, thought I can't seem to figure out why. They come and go, but so does her tastes so it's probably diet related. I haven't started potty training yet; call me lazy but it sounds like too much work in the winter! Too many pants and layers to undo before you get to the potty.

jillsmo said...

I'm a little sad this post isn't accompanied by a video of you grunting and straining to squeeze one out, but, okay.

Heather said...

our potty training actually took YEARS (okay it was about 18 months) and he wasn't fully trained until he was five...even now, we still kinda struggle with a hygienic method of BMs

so yes Lyn, I don't like you anymore ;)

Aimee said...

Awesome poop post. GA poops like a champ, always has, twice a day, she's in,she washes up, shes, out and makes the anouncement to us all about how things went in there.

Wow, I'm so lucky, no fair,............NOT!!!!

I've been changing poopy diapers of first born for 10 years. With no end in sight.(she's 10, but the size of a 6 year old) Had to replace her carpet in bedroom, twice. On staff ABA therapists at school makes regular home visits and has had no luck with either. We're still trying, and have a new program in place, but I'm so used to it, I really don't care anymore. Also we put Pergo in her bedroom now. However I REALLY worry about her becoming an adult who needs assistance in the bathroom. For all sorts of CRAPPY reasons I'm too afraid to write down. :(

Bethany said...

As a special ed teacher I changed more diapers and was a part of more potty training plans than I would like to remember. I had one little girl with autism who hated the way poop felt in her diaper so she would just drop trou wherever she was and leave a trail of little brown presents behind her naked, well behind. One of my inclusion peers looked at me one day during lunch and informed me "Miss Beth, there is POOP on the floor!" I replied very calmly, because this was afterall rather normal, "I know Antonio, I am guarding the poop while Miss April goes to get the cleaner.". He shook his little three year old head and said "Well, MY MOTHER would NEVER let this happen at home!" I also had a fully potty trained inclusion peer go potty, then come find me and ask me where her prize was. I asked her for what, and she said for going potty. I replied "welcome to the real world sweetheart. No one gives me a prize when I go pee in the potty and no one here is going to give you one either. You just gotta do it."

ryoko861 said...

"turtlehead"? We call it "gophering" or "prairie doggin'"!

I've read many blogs about burping, farting, spitting, but none yet about pooping. Today was the day. My list is complete.

Lou said...

Oh yeah, bathroom stories...
We're a bilingual household, predominantly English with some Spanish mixed in for good measure. Spanish for poop is "caca" and somewhere along the way my son picked up that word and uses it to indicate his need to use the facilities. He'll come up to one of us and say "Want caca?" (echolalia at its best) and it is anyone's guess if it will be #1 or #2 since he uses that phrase prior to EVERY trip to the bathroom. For the next 30 seconds as we walk to the bathroom (he still requires someone to take him every time) I am sweating it out and hoping for #1...
This past weekend he even started "Want peepee, caca?" Oh boy!!

Great story Lynn!!

Cori said...

Ugh thanks for reminding me i still have to potty train the triplets ... Well luckily just the boys, the girl is done!

Great post!!!

Bad_Bad_Mommy said...

So, what made you think that Audrey was ready for potty training? Or did you just try? We are getting A LOT of pressure from her preschool program to get KT potty trained. They even tried to use that as an excuse to place her in a CI classroom rather than an AI room - so she could be with "peers". Appreciate the blog!

Bad_Bad_Mommy said...

So, what made you think that Audrey was ready for potty training? Or did you just try? We are getting A LOT of pressure from her preschool program to get KT potty trained. They even tried to use that as an excuse to place her in a CI classroom rather than an AI room - so she could be with "peers". Appreciate the blog!

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