A sassy, crafty mama bird from Los Angeles
raising a very sweet little girl with Autism
and a new baby boy in the Midwest... and other stuff, too.

Sunday, July 25, 2010

For Lori

My heart is heavy. I've lost a friend. A really great, beautiful, amazing, non-judgmental, open, honest friend.

I've told you about Lori before, and her efforts to raise awareness and funds to fight cancer. But what I will remember her for is her kindness and her unabashed acceptance for anything that deviated from the norm. She was always the first to tell me that she didn't care if my kid was having a rough time or was  "off," she'd insist that we come over and play anyway. She was the only person who volunteered to take the bird for a few hours while we said goodbye to Sugar Magnolia. She probably got that generosity from her parents. One year while walking the track with her parents at the Relay For Life, they learned that we have no family here. They immediately insisted that we spend holidays at their house. And we did.

Lori passed away yesterday after fighting for a long 5 1/2 years with cancer. It was discovered just 6 weeks after delivering her gorgeous, smart and funny little boy. Can you imagine? You've just had your first baby with the most spectacular guy- you're over the moon- and then... this. Never would I ever say that Lori lost her fight. She kicked the shit out of that cancer. We're talking stage four ovarian cancer. She'd knock it down again and again every time it reared it's ugly head. She endured all kinds of therapies, clinical trials, etc. She was so brave and such an inspiration. Truly walking through this whole long illness with grace and dignity. The last six months had been rough. She lost her dad to the same disease. She was in pain. She wasn't happy. But she was still funny. I'm forever keeping our text messages to prove that!

Yesterday I noticed that a few people visited those old posts on this blog (yes, I can see that). So, I did, too. I looked back at others, as well. Others that Lori had commented on. Just reading her words made me sad. I'm so sad for me and for all the people who were lucky enough to call her a friend. This is a tremendous loss for us, but the universe is better off for ever having had her in it. The stars are very lucky tonight, because I know she's up there shining among them.

Thank you, Lori for letting me into your life; for being a friend that I could always count on; and, well, for just being you.

**Hey, if anyone is near 26th and San Vicente in Santa Monica, please grab a drink from Zen Zoo tea and tip a little bit out for my homie. It was one of her favorite places!!

Here's a link to Lori's blog. You can read her own words and you'll recognize right away just how special she was.

It is suggested that those who wish to further honor the memory of Lori Haber Buckfire may do so by making a contribution to:
Karmanos Cancer Institute
Gail Purtan Ovarian Cancer Research Fund
4100 John R.
Detroit, MI 48201


Heather said...

I'm so sorry for your loss Dani. (((HUGS)))

I was one of those people that recently visited an old post about Lori- I think it showed up under one of your recent posts....it was strange to me that it popped up because one of my closest friends was just diagnosed with breast cancerfive days ago. It was nice to read how your friend was able to fight the disease for so long.

Lynn said...

So sorry to hear about your friend. I read some of the old posts too. Friends like that are hard to come by and we can't afford to lose them so soon.

Ren- Lady Of The Arts said...

Oh Dani- I am so sorry- My heart goes out to Lori's husband and son.

melissa said...

she was special, that girl. that is for sure.

Penny said...

How tragic. And sad. And how blessed you were to have known Lori. She sounds like an absolutely wonderful person and friend. My love and prayers are with her family and friends today.

Anonymous said...

So sorry to hear about Lori. I know how much she meant to you, honey. A very special person who showed us all how to be courageous, generous and loving in the worst of circumstances. I know you will miss her. I'm sending good vibes to her husband and baby.And to you too, my Birdie. Mom

Laura @ The Things I Said I'd Never Do said...

I am so sorry about the loss of your friend. I hope your good memories of her will help you through the sadness.

Sunday said...

I am so sorry you lost such a dear friend.
I am sure she was blessed as much by your friendship as you were with hers.
Godspeed Lori, Godspeed.

sugar magnolia said...

Obviously I didn't know Lori, but I feel like I know a little more after reading all this. I'm so sorry, Dani. I don't know what else to say. Sometimes life is so freaking unfair. Hugs.

tami said...

I would not have known Lori if it wasn't for you Danielle. You have a knack for putting people in touch with people who can change their lives. Being your friend has changed my life in the best of ways and Lori too was someone I will NEVER forget. I cry as I think of the loss of such a great person and I smile as I think her personality. She certainly was a one of a kind individual who will be missed by many...

Maggie May said...

I'm so sorry you lost an amazing friend.

Dani G said...

Thank you to everyone for saying such kind things. Everyone who knew Lori is WAY better off for ever getting the chance to be around her. I will miss her sooooo much.

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