A sassy, crafty mama bird from Los Angeles
raising a very sweet little girl with Autism
and a new baby boy in the Midwest... and other stuff, too.

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Isn't it pretty to think so

"Californiaaaaaaaa, Californiaaaaaaa"
-Phantom Planet

I just had a completely crazy, in-freaking-sane thought. Wouldn't it be nice to move back to California?** Back to the land where everyone has their own swimming pools and the weather is nice all year round. Back to the land where I'd never struggle to find support, child care, good restaurants, diversity, help, etc. Back to the land where there are great programs for kids with special needs; where there is even insurance coverage for autism-related services and therapies.
It's really hard to be so far away from family- to do this from all the way over here. I need more help than I'm getting. I need real, unconditional love and support. I need someone to take my kid off my hands for an hour so that I can get it together enough to handle the rest of the day. People often suggest I get a sitter or a nanny, but I never really have enough time to offer (we're going from one therapy to another all day long). The truth is, the cons outweigh the pros. Still, just as Lady Brett Ashley says in the closing line of The Sun Also Rises, "isn't it pretty to think so?" **whatever you do, DO NOT tell my husband or my parents that I had this thought. And under NO circumstances can you breathe a word to my mother in law!!


lori b said...

i have that same thought. every day. evereeee day. and my whole family knows.its not a secret......so go ahead and tell em!

SAMANTHA said...


Madelyn said...

We have the same California dreaming you have! And I won't tell any of your OTHER relatives.

My name is Erin. said...

Well maybe in California there would be more help, but I find it interesting, because we moved here to get more help. We had been living in Vermont with slim to NO help whatsoever. So at least you can take some comfort in knowing that there is somewhere in the States where you would be even worse off. I wish you lived nearby. We could trade babysitting/playdates... if only for an hour or two.

I have to ask about something you said which correlates with something that has been bothering me since I moved here. You said that Cali had more "diversity". But Michigan is more diverse than any other state I've lived in (Idaho, Montana, Alaska, Oregon, Vermont). Yet, I feel like the races, with a few exceptions, really keep to themselves. There is a very "birds of a feather flock together" vibe going on and it kind of bothers me. It bothers me, because it feels very segregated. Is it just me? Because the birds I'd like to flock with are of the human variety. That's really my only criteria for friendship. I like cats and dogs, too, but I do need more human friends. ;)

Anonymous said...

you know my mom reads this - right?
you are so busted.
and brodie's cousin wants her to live here.

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